My point is that text doesn't necessarily convey how they meant it. Their experience of the advisor's passing was indirect, so it isn't all that crazy that what stands out to them is how it affected their SO and the obvious effect it'd have had on the advisor's family.
That's because I'm me and not anyone else. It was pretty traumatic for my SO and everyone else around the PI. The PI insisted on going into work and continuing on like nothing changed even as they were mentally deteriorating. If I don't include details about the tragedy it might be because I don't want to bring that energy to my comment and not because I somehow was oblivious to their significance.
